Saturday, August 2, 2008

A Rat's Nest

My hair drives me crazy sometimes. It is very fine, but I have a TON of it. Sonny works his magic on my hundreds of layers to make it lay so, so much better. But, the fineness is still a problem. The bottom layer gets so incredibly tangly by mid-day when I wear my hair down. Sometimes I lift up my hair and show off the tangles, always drawing gasps from my audience!

I have tried many detanglers...sprays, lotions. I use Biolage Ultra Hydrating Balm every time I wash my hair and patiently/gently comb out the tangles. No matter what I do, however, I have had to accept that I am going to have a small to medium rat's nest on the bottom layer of my hair.

This is where my pursuit for perfection gets me obsessed. For a few years, I have sought the perfect product, the perfect routine to get rid of this flaw. And, now, have had to admit and be content with defeat.

I think it's good for me to recognize that there are some things I just can't change. My goal in all of my product/routine searching is to be the best version of myself, not someone else. I glean things from what I like from other people. But, at the end of the day, my hair is still going to be fine and still get very tangly.

And, once I admit that, I can be liberated to do all that I can...and live in acceptance of my very tangly hair. I think that it's the same in life. Sometimes, it is so healthy to just accept the things we can't change.

Until I stop caring altogether, I will still use Phillip B Detangling Finishing Rinse. I will continue to use heavy conditioners to comb out the tangles both in and out of the shower, experiment with hair glosses, braid my hair at night, and be mindful of the rat's nest growing everyday. None of these things take away the problem, but that's ok with me.


Bekah said...

I'm an Aveda girl at heart, but can't afford to keep it up all the time...not sure what their detangler might be either.
However, I have used a Healthy Sexy Hair "Soy Tri-Wheat" leave in conditioner as a detangler before (when my hair was long). I'm like you and have always depended on a good conditioner to help my fine hair comb out easier. But this detangler is a spray in and did seem to help after i got out of the shower. Might be worth checking out. :-)

Kara said...

I'll have to try it! Even today, I got so frustrated by mid-day with the rat's nest!! Nothing I do seems to be a permanent fix.

The Kitty said...

you know, maybe not layering the underside of your hair (where it gets so tangly) so much would help? if there are lots of layers in that fine hair it might make it more tangle-prone since the hairs are all different lengths. just a thought, i'm probably wrong, but i figured i'd throw in my 2 cents. also, maybe using something with silicone to add some slip to your hair could help?